Here are the last five of nine steps you can use to help you communicate important information without losing friends and without getting fired.
1. Ask for help. When you ask for help, start your sentence with “will you” or “will you please.” Be very specific about what you need or want. “Please send me a copy of the letter before you send it out,” is much more specific than “will you please keep me in the information loop.” “Bring the desert to serve six people,” is much more specific than “bring something to share for the party.”
2. Be vulnerable rather then controlling. Say “ouch” when you feel hurt rather than trying to force someone to stop hurting you. Doing this allows someone else the opportunity to help relieve your pain.
3. Assume that everyone involved has good intentions. This may or may not be true to start with, but if you approach the situation with this attitude, others are likely to be cooperative in response.
4. Allow others to save face. Own your part in the misunderstanding, even if you think you were perfectly clear and a hundred percent correct. Preface your conversation with statements like “I might not have explained to myself clearly,” or “I know you were very busy when I presented that to you.” If you create an excuse for somebody, that person would be less likely to try to defend him or herself.
5. Suggest an outcome in which everybody will feel like a winner. It helps to know the details of what others consider most important. Often it’s possible for you to let someone else have what he or she most wants at little cost to yourself.
Learn more about communicating with integrity in The Integrity Course, an online, multimedia home-study course to help you say what you think without getting fired or losing your friends.
[tags]Emotional Intelligence, Difficult Communication, Business Communication, Telling the Truth, Management, Conflict[/tags]
